kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
