Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
