I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
