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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker

  (914): View more from New York

  Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  "If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."

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• (925): View more from California

  it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.

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