brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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