Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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