it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
