He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
