remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
