Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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