so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
