we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i drank out of a bidet.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
