Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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