3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
