I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I think a kid would responsible me up
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize
