i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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