You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
