Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
