In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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