I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
