So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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