the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
