very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
