Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize
