Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
