More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
