u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
he thought i was a dude.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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