So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
