i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
He kissed a someone with a penis
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
