no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize