please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
