GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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