It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
