piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
