I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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