our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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