Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
