you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
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