what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
