I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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