i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
