yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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