no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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