good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Dick very happy bro
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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