she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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