I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i barfeds in our rink
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
