I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
