Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize