I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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