Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize